


Only your touch

by kiminspirit



Category: Infinite (Band), K-pop
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Cuddling & Snuggling, M/M, myungsoo's dad is a little shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-31
Updated: 2017-03-31
Packaged: 2018-10-13 04:28:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10506321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiminspirit/pseuds/kiminspirit
Summary: Myungsoo loves touching people. Howon doesn’t like to be touched.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted at LiveJournal (where is also a spanish version)-same author-.  
> English is not my first language, I tried to make this as correct as possible but still there might be some mistakes. I apologize beforehand for that.

He looked among all of that bunch of lines his name, in the rooms sheets,  to see which one would be his _ . “Lee Howon, room 79”.  _ He didn’t even bother in looking for who his new roommate would be, anyway he was sure it would be someone he had never seen before.

  
He unpacked his clothes and other stuff from his suitcase and placed them very neatly in the closet, then he lay down to rest on his surprisingly comfortable bed. While trying with not so much success to sleep, the door opened revealing a pale skin dark-haired young man with a fluffy red scarf around his neck that covered half his face.  _ Cute _ was Howon’s first impression of the boy who later would introduce himself as Kim Myungsoo. 

  
Howon was right. He had never seen him before.

 

  
  
During their time sharing a room Howon couldn’t say they had a close relationship, at least he doesn’t feel it that way. He doesn’t know whether Myungsoo thinks the same.  Howon is not exactly a friendly person, he doesn’t show affection very often, let alone physical affection. It seems that in this last aspect Myungsoo is totally  the opposite.

  
At first he thought it was kind of weird the fact that his roommate was so… expressive. The first few days sharing room while Howon did his homework in the desk Myungsoo would suddenly appear behind him and touch him. In any possible (definitely non-sexual) way. Like he would just come and touch his hair or hung on his arm while telling him things he was not interested in hearing.

Sometimes even in class hours or lunch  time the younger boy back-hugged him with no apparent reason and Howon, being the kindest possible in order to not hurt Myungsoo's feelings, rejected him using any simple and rather stupid excuse.  But it was weird. Why did he care about not hurting him in first place? Any other person coming to him, hugging him, he would surely apply them a wrestling key on. It made no sense. But Myungsoo didn’t give a damn. 

 

 

That day Howon felt his heart falling to the ground. Falling hard.

  
Myungsoo came crying to the room looking like he was holding his tears all the way through. Leaving his red scarf and coat lying on the ground he headed to his bed where he laid  face down and kept crying. Howon let the book he was comfortably reading, his body acting by itself ended at the edge of his roommate bed.

  
Being right there he didn’t know what to do. He wanted to ask him if he was ok but he was obviously not. Without even knowing why his hand went right to Myungsoo’s hair, carefully stroking it. Myungsoo was feeling so bad that he didn’t have time to be surprised. Besides, he did not care. What he wanted right now was company. He moved himself to the other side of the bed leaving space for Howon to lay down.

  
He hesitated for a moment but at the end he did as the younger one asked, without saying the words. He thought his brain was not functioning correctly. The moment he properly laid down in the bed Myungsoo snuggled at his side wrapping Howon´s torso in his arms. Howon didn’t know how to react, he was about to pull away when he felt wetness on his shirt and realized Myungsoo was still crying silently. He also felt the boy’s hand tightly gripped in his shirt. Was it that bad? Sooner or later he would know the reason of his crying. For the moment, he just focused on making him company. Seeing him that fragile and delicate he felt the sudden and mysterious urge to protect him, even if it was just for a moment.   
Following the younger boy’s actions, he too wrapped his arms around him. And Myungsoo fell asleep.

  
Howon’s brain was failing for sure.

 

  
  
After that, Myungsoo would follow Howon  _ everywhere  _ like a cute dark-hired puppy, and most of the time he spends it stuck to the older one, quite literally. So as expected Howon got used to his presence and touches more than what he’d like to admit. 

  
Usually, Howon would be reading lying on his bed, music sounding on his earphones, with Myungsoo by his side, shoulders touching. But not today. It was Christmas holidays and both were with their respective families. 

  
Howon, as usual, was reading, but this time somehow he couldn’t concentrate. He knew very well what the reason was. He found himself reading the same lines repeatedly the last three minutes. Tired of his failed attempts on understanding the text he closed the 623-pages book leaving it on the nightstand. He stirred on the bed looking for a better position to rest and closed his eyes trying, and failing miserably, to sleep.  He could only stare at the wall and the empty space at his side.

  
He sighed deeply.

  
“Seems that I got used to you more than what I thought.”

  
He took his phone and searched for Myungsoo’s number even though when he’d found it he wouldn’t call. That’s exactly what he was doing the past three days: take the phone, found the number, re-think his decision, leave said phone on the nightstand and repeat it all the next day. It kind of became a routine.  Although he wanted to deny it he knew that, more than missing him, he was  _ worried _ for him.

  
The thing is that Myungsoo had told him why was he crying the other day. The boy’s family owns a big company which Myungsoo is heir of. But Myungsoo doesn’t want to be. He's currently studying visual arts major and clearly his father didn’t approve it, a photographer was useless for him. Basically Mr. Kim tried to force him to change his major, of course Myungsoo did not agree.  He also told him he chose to be resident in the campus because living in the mansion (because of course it is a mansion) with his family was suffocating. So now that he was actually with them for Christmas holidays Howon was incredibly anxious.

  
Then his cellphone started ringing.

  
_ Kim Koala Myungsoo  _

  
He chuckled at the contact name he used for his roommate. He thought it was an accurate nickname after all.

  
“Yes?”

  
_ “Hyung…” _

  
Howon could easily notice a dark -even sad- tone in his voice. He guessed Myungsoo was not having good vacations, “Is everything alright?”

  
“ _ I can’t stand it. Really, I can’t stand it anymore.”  _ He was clearly sobbing, and Howon could do nothing about it, “ _ Hyung, it’s been four days only and I already feel like drowning.” _

  
“Would you like to tell me? But first stop crying, I can’t comfort you” he sure heard a chuckle at the other side of the line. Then Myungsoo spilled it all out in a storm of words. Howon thought he didn’t even had time to breath. 

  
“ _ Dad doesn’t stop talking about business, it’s suffocating. And mom can’t do anything about it. It’s supposed to be freaking Christmas holidays, we should be doing, I don’t know, things together! Anything! But why he keeps bombing me with problems that are not mine and I don’t even care about? I don’t give a damn about that stupid Company of his. I personally think my brother would do a better job than me.”  _ He stopped, taking air.  _ “I want to get the hell out of here. I never thought I’d said this but… I want to go back to school.”  _

  
They talked (more like Myungsoo talked) for about fifteen minutes until Myungsoo left but promised he would call back again at night. In the next call, it was Howon’s turn to ask the questions, something he was curious about.

  
“Myungsoo...”

  
_ “Yes?” _

  
“If you were here, where would you touch me?” at the other side of the phone Myungsoo could only chuckle. 

  
_ “What’s that about?” _ Howon could practically  _ feel _ his smirk  _ “You know that sounded like we were about to have sex-phone, right?” _

  
“Just answer the question” and yes, he knew how weird that sounded. It definitely went better in his head.

  
_ “What are you doing?” _

  
“Nothing. Just lying on my bed” the answer came immediately.

  
_ “Come on! Then you already know. I’d be lying by your side. Might or might not be hugging you.” _

  
Howon smiled. He was expecting that answer. But now that he had heard it from him it felt _real._ Howon could imagine Myungsoo on the bed, by his side. He could feel the warmness of Myungsoo’s body like he was really there. 

  
_ I shouldn’t be getting used to him. _

 

  
  
“It’s still winter, why are you wearing sun glasses?”

  
“Basically,” he answered, closing the door behind him. He took off his coat and scarf leaving them  hanging on the coat rack. “I told my dad I would be returning to photography and that I don’t care about the Company.” then he took off the glasses. “Earned a punch”

  
Giving a long sigh, Howon left momentarily forgotten his Angry Birds game and went directly to Myungsoo’s bed where he was sat, looking not so happy. He sat with him inspecting his left eye were the punch mark was, red and ugly.

  
“Is it recent? Does it hurt?” 

  
“ _ Ouch.  _ A little. It was last night, that’s why it looks fresh and swollen”

  
“What a way to come back to school.”

  
Myungsoo grinned but flinched right away “Make it stop”

  
Howon took a moment to think, then an idea crossed his mind. When he was a child he often did things that resulted in minor accidents and little wounds, so his mother used to kiss said wound to ease the pain. He didn’t think twice. He took Myungsoo’s head between his hands and slowly placed his lips on his swollen skin, very close to his left eye, Myungsoo’s eyelashes almost brushing Howon’s lips. Later, he would call that an unexpected act of bravery. 

  
The younger one blinked like a deer flashed by lights. Well, that was something he didn’t exactly expect, let alone coming from _Howon_. He knew very well that Howon wasn’t really fond of physical contact (totally opposite to Myungsoo I might add). “Still hurt?” he asked.

  
“Not anymore."  Another thing that surprised him even more (if possible) was Howon hugging him. Lee _fucking_ Howon  _ hugging _ him. He almost fainted.

  
“I’ve missed you” He had his chin placed on top of Myungsoo’s head, which was, at the same time, against Howon’s chest.

  
“You ok?” that came as a muffled sound. “It’s usually  _ me _ touching people, not  _ you _ . And why are you not letting me go?” 

  
“Shut up. Just stay still and don’t ruin the moment.”  Myungsoo did not protest. He actually liked it, he didn’t say it, though. He liked the feeling of being hugged for once instead of being the hugger. It was warm. His chest was warm. His hugs were warm. He thought he could stay like that for the rest of the winter.

 

  
  
Jealously.

  
Jealously.

  
_… Jealously?_

  
That was the only word crossing his mind at the moment. Was he jealous?  _ Really, Howon? _

  
He himself didn’t know whether that was the correct word to describe what he was feeling. Seeing Myungsoo in the library hanging from someone else's arm send a current of uneasy feelings through his spine. It’s not that things had changed between them, no. Myungsoo was still the same. It’s just that Howon didn’t like that it was not him who his roommate showed affection to.

  
After what he saw in the library what happened in the café wasn’t any better. He could stand Myungsoo stroking someone else’s hair, even taking their arms, but there are only so many things one could tolerate. And Myungsoo back-hugging anybody was not one of these things. That was a big  _ no _ .

  
The only consolation he had was knowing that the boy was his roommate, that they shared a room and sometimes, bed too (in a manly, friendly way). 

  
Later that day, both went out of the room heading for a coffee to the nearest coffee shop around the campus. It was freezing out there and it didn’t take them long to get their beverages but when they got back to the street it was even colder. Myungsoo, who always carried his scarf with him, this time, unfortunately, didn’t. He was freezing, quite literally.   Howon, seeing how the younger one tried to put up with the cold weather, took off his own scarf from his neck to place it around Myungsoo’s, whose words, suddenly, left him.

It was a cute gesture, Myungsoo thought. Maybe the most significant one till now. They kept walking, Howon trying to ignore the intense bewildered gaze his roommate had on him. He, then, felt a grab on his hand. He didn’t need to look down. He knew that it was Myungsoo’s hand holding his. Howon didn’t say a thing about it.  He did  _ not _ mind, at all.

  
Neither of them glanced at each other nor talked for the rest of their way.

 

 

  
“Hyung, may I ask you something?”

  
“If you want” he said without looking away from his book. Myungsoo watched him, disappointed; was it really that bunch of sheets that interesting? Like, how could he not even look at him when he answered? He leaned forward to be able to read, even if it was just the title, but Howon prevent him from doing it, putting down the book. “Are you going to ask something, or what?”

  
“Hyung, is that book really that interesting?”

  
“Is that your question?” he said, raising an eyebrow.

  
“ _ No _ ”

  
“Throw it”

  
Myungsoo got off his bed to sit on the other one, earning a quiet glare from Howon, who also changed his position, leaving the book aside,  “Why don’t you avoid my touches anymore?”

  
“You noticed?”

  
“For God´s sake! These were the most direct hints that I’ve ever gotten. For real. Anyone would notice, you've not exactly been subtle, you know?"

  
Howon sighed. “I don’t know.”

  
“Hyung…”

  
“Myungsoo,” and he knew he was serious. What he did  _ not _ expect was a sudden hug that Howon had the initiative to give,  “please, don’t. Don’t do it anymore.”

  
“What are you talking about?”

  
“Don’t touch them. Don’t touch anyone, don’t hold their arms, don’t stroke their hair, don’t hug them, don’t take their hands like you did with me the other day. That’s what I’m here for. You can do that with me instead. Just with me. I mean… you get what I’m saying?”

  
Howon couldn’t see the huge smile in the boy’s face, having him trapped in his arms. Once again, Myungsoo thought that he could spend the rest of his _life_ like that. But he had to act, fast, before his perfect opportunity faded away. He managed to get out from Howon’s arms and looked at his eyes. He gathered all his courage to do what he thought he would never do. He kissed him. It took Howon by surprise. It was easily less than three seconds, but why did it feel like forever?

  
Howon blinked.

  
“That… can’t I do that with anyone else, either?”

  
“Nor even in your best dreams.”

  
They smiled to each other. Then Myungsoo tackled him onto his own bed. And they stayed like that, Myungsoo above Howon,  “You are like a cute koala.” Howon said, feeling Myungsoo smile against his chest, his arms around him.

  
Staring to each other, slowly, they closed the distance between their lips. Short kisses that became longer every time they touched. If Myungsoo believed he could live in Howon’s arms the rest of his life, now, in that position, he was sure he could stay like that for the _eternity_. 

  
_Sweet_ , Howon thought, feeling Myungsoo’s lips on his. Without breaking the kiss, Myungsoo took his roommate’s hand. “I thought you didn’t liked being touched”

  
“I can make an exception.” 

  
“Great.” 

  
They spend the next ten minutes lying down that way, until their stomach protested, asking to be urgently fed. They stood up and got out from their room,  “Oh! Wait. I left my scarf inside. Go ahead, I’ll catch up.” Myungsoo said before running back to their room. Of course, Howon didn’t move.

  
Myungsoo entered the room, quickly taking his scarf. He was about to leave when he remembered something… what was Howon reading? Smirking to himself, he went to his _boyfriend’s_ bed (he liked how that sounded). Taking the forgotten book, he read the title, then chuckled,  “Interesting.” He left the room thinking how could have he ever gotten such book.

  
“What took you so long?” Howon asked, seeing the younger one coming back.

  
“Couldn’t find it.”

  
Hand in hand they left to the cafeteria, hoping that there would be good food.


End file.
